This photo of November's Flower of the Month seems appropriate for me. The single orange flower surrounded by the neutral white really represents my life this past month. Mom had a mild stroke. It was small, Thank God, and she's recovered from the physical effects but her Dementia took the turn for that next step. The one where she seems OK to everyone else at first, but she needs someone with her all the time now.
It's been rough. Lots of changes and I've felt like I was alone many times during her stroke recovery and transition to this new life. The truth is, however, that my faith, family, (especially my husband) friends, and her medical team have been the white flowers. The single flowers grouped tightly together that have held me up.
Also, during this time my sister fell seriously ill. We try to work as a team to care for Mom but she needs to care for herself. I'm sure she felt like the orange flower too. Alone but with a quiet team of support to hold her up.
Last, but certainly not the least is Mom. I'm sure that she's happy most of the time. We see to that. But I'm also sure that she feels alone when she truly believes the stories she's telling, when she is positive that she already took her meds (or ate, or bathed, or talked to someone on the phone). Her self esteem hits a low point many days. She gets angry and it's hard to remain patient with her. But much of the time she's like the Chrysanthemum. Cheerful and loving. We'll hold on to that as long as we can! Love You Much Mom!
2 comments:
Cindy, what a good daughter you are! You are doing holy work. I am in a similar situation but you are handling it much better than me. God bless you.
Wow, Cindy, you really have a way with words? You're descriptions of the flowers is so perfect for the situation. I cared for my Mom at home for a year and I know how wearing it is both physically and emotionally. God bless you for caring enough to do it. I found the key is to get some respite now and then even if just for a couple hours.
If you're not OK you won't be able to take care of your Mom. I will never feel guilty that I didn't do the best I could for mine and you'll feel the same. Best of luck!
Phyllis Kohnke
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